Well, I suppose it’s time to use this blog space a bit. The hardest part about splitting up, for me, is that it takes so damn long. Things had been over with my husband a while, I’d realized things about myself and he had realized things about himself.
It’s sad to feel like you’re only keeping a relationship because it’s what you know and safe. To realize that feeling is right is draining. And that’s how I can explain this whole situation: draining. I slept for almost nine hours last night – draining.
Telling my co-workers has been easier with each passing telling. The first time it felt like I was admitting “I give up” to someone, but after a fifteen year relationship I think I gave it my best shot. I don’t regret everything, I do regret some things, all I can do now is move on.
Part of moving on is looking for a new place. This is a daunting task for me, considering I’ve been living with my to-be-ex for over ten years. Living alone is scary and yet, exciting. I’m looking forward to doing a lot of things I couldn’t do when I wasn’t single. Things like not wearing pants and being left alone about it, making food that I want to eat and not feeling like a jackass because he isn’t going to eat anything, and actually decorating a place to my liking.
I’ve taken the first steps by looking at places. I need a place that will accept dogs, particularly since another thing I want to start doing that I couldn’t do before was foster large breed dogs for adoption agencies. I need a certain price-range (not particularly a problem, considering my income and lack of bills outside of my student loans). I’d like a place with a fireplace because who wants to pay a heating bill.
There are a *lot* of sites that tout how good they are at finding places. So far I haven’t been using any long enough to say if I’ve had any luck or not.
http://www.hotpads.com – So far a good search engine that has given me the option to email questions about properties. I’m not having swift luck in people calling me back yet, but I do have a lot of places listed as favorites to call on.
http://www.craigslist.com – I’ve left five emails, heard back from one, responded to said one, to not hear from them again. We’ll see if it pans out.
http://www.rent.com – A little cleaner looking than craigslist and a lot clunkier than hotpads.com. I’m not having much luck with it at all.
Something that’s important to me as a newly single women (despite my giant dog love) is safety. So I have taken to using http://www.spotcrime.com and my city police’s website to do my searches.
Once I find a promising place I plug the address into spotcrime’s search bar. It will pop up with a map of the area and all the crimes that have happend in a certain time frame complete with police case number. You can copy paste that case number into your local police station’s search engine in most cases and turn up the basic police report.
This has helped me narrow my search down.
Considering I’m not yet in the process of unloading my house, I’m not in a giant rush. In fact my realtor suggested I live in the house as long as I am able to without paying the mortgage. But if the perfect place comes along, I’m not going to turn it down.
I’ve also taken steps to collect boxes from my place of employment. I’m going to try filling one box for yard sale for every two boxes I want to keep. (Hopefully more).
Here’s to hoping things go smoothly.