Not too long ago I read a very interesting book called Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience which basically brought interesting study-based insights into how I operate. Well, how a lot of people do, but I had always wondered why simply sitting and channel-surfing always left me feeling tired and other such passive activities. While reading, something else considered somewhat passive, always left me energized.
Turns out my finicky behavior in regards to my things naturally stems from finicky behavior in regards to my mental state. That is, I really don’t deal well with mental entropy.
Since it’s approaching the end of my semester and thus doom, I have found myself in a state of mental entropy more than I’d like to be in, to great detriment. Especially considering I have one class that relies on memorization heavily, something which I’ve never been good at. I find myself noticing that I’m “spacing out more” and generally having to write things down to remind myself to write things down.
All in all, it’s been an unpleasant week, to say the least.
The biggest problem with entropy is when you notice it, it only gets worse and breeds more entropy. As much as anyone would like to say that they have things under control–they don’t. At best we just have a good response to the chaos around us, little ways to assert a small bit of control over certain areas. Which is likely to turn all philosophical and next thing you know, you’re pulling out some Cartesian Doubt and you sound like a looney.
So far the only thing I’ve found that can soothe states of mental entropy is that, when I have the time, I sit and focus on one very menial task. Like dusting. Or sewing a button onto something. It’s only a temporary fix, but it sure helps me to remember that I am not simply a toy of wicked evil Fates or something.
Funny how a lot of the things stated in the Flow book are related to a lot of Eastern philosophy, only with different goals. Flow is based on achieving a form of control, while a lot of Eastern thought is about losing it.
Maybe it’s time to switch tactics and give into the universe a little? Naw.